Fletch wrote:Buz Groshong wrote:Actually, they are already included in trad climbers.
Im not middle aged!
To find out if ice climbing is for you,
1. Ask, read, and lose as much sleep as possible wondering what style of ice gear is right for you.
2. Bring your VISA card to your closest climbing store and spend all of next year's disposable income on equipment that somebody on the internet recommended based on hearsay.
3. Hide the gear at home and try to control the fear that the thought of "your wife finding out that you just spend $3K that you didn't have" will bring to your heart.
4. Using a 10 lbs. frozen sea bass, smash the backside your fingers until you can't hold the frozen carcass any longer.
5. In front of an open refrigerator, strip to your underwear, place 10 or 12 ice cubes around your testicles, poor a gallon of cold water over your head, and repeat "Man... This is f*cking great!".
6. Tie yourself to a massive object just under the balconies of your local retirement home, display a sign that reads "Save my future... Reduce Social Security benefits now!", and try to survive the barrage of large hurling objects coming your way.
7. Ask your neighbor to tie his Rottweiler with a shoelace at the other side of a 4 foot fence. Smack the dog a couple of times and repeat "If the string breaks, the fence will hold him back... the fence will hold... the fence will hold..."
8. Call-in sick Friday morning. Jump in the car with a couple of guys with questionable personal hygiene and drive for 13 hours. Get our of the car, realize that there is no ice to be climbed and return home feeling still excited about the prospects for ice climbing the next weekend.
9. Find out, from your new friends, that half of the gear that you bought in step #2 is really worthless and that "...only 'Posers' buy that stuff".
10. Over a romantic dinner, tell your wife that she will be on-her-own for Thanksgiving, X-mas, New Year's, Martin Luther King Day, and Presidents' Day, because you will be driving "up-north" with "the guys".
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