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Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 12:41 am
by thespiffy
Either something you said, a friend, buddy or a line from a book.

I'll start;

My climbing partner and I's exchange after I wrapped up cleaning the route -- clipping in to the anchor I noticed his tree sapling anchor on pitch 6 of a climb;
Me: "What's up with that ?" *pointing to anchor*
Him: "This? Oh it's bomb"
Me: "It's a dead sapling"
Him: "No it's not" *shakes the tree*
*sticks rain down on our heads from the dead sapling*
Him: "Ok, it's half alive"

Joe Simpson's - The Beckoning Silence
"Unlike their predecessors (ice screws) they can hold quite substantial falls, if the ice is good, and they no longer require enough energy expenditure to light up a small city when you place them"

My partner was asked by one of my friends who doesn't climb;
"Who do you pray to when you fall?"
My partner says: "My belayer"

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:50 pm
by thespiffy
Well then.

I'll just assume you all only climb with mutes.

Rad.

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 3:15 pm
by WingLady
We were walking along the base of a wall with several easy to moderate routes, when we heard this proclamation by a young man leading a 5.7 pitch, calling out to his belayer:

"Dude! This is a lot harder than the gym!"

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 3:35 pm
by adventurer
As we discuss a tricky unroped night descent to avoid an unplanned bivy; I say to my climbing partner, "we both have headlamps, let's just go real slow and be careful....we'll be fine"
His reply; "OK, you go first. That way if your light disappears, I'll know where the edge is"

Another time in the Andes with the same partner. I wake up at 5AM in our tent feeling unusually cold even in my bag. I ask him to grab his Suunto from the tent pocket and read the temp.
He does so and says, it's 21. I complain bitterly and ask him how that's possible. He checks again turns to me and says, "I forgot the minus sign".

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 5:39 pm
by wildoats
I'm not sure who gets credit for this quote, but I read it in Jim Whittaker's book:
There's an old saying that climbers rope up so the smart ones can't leave

Also a fan of this one from Kelly Cordes:
Of course fun comes in different forms, from Type I fun (fun while it’s happening, otherwise known as fun), to the rewarding Type II fun (fun only in retrospect), and occasionally Type III fun (not fun at all)

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 6:22 pm
by Hotoven
My partner...

"Nate, quit Ghetto palm'em that rock son!"

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 10:46 pm
by kamil
'Let's go. The mountains are waiting for victims.'

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:32 pm
by Andinistaloco
Climbing in the Tetons:

Me, 20 feet up: "Damn, this is getting kind of funky up here."
Partner: "Yeah, that's why I let you lead it."

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:56 pm
by Matt Worster
During a traverse with few chances of pro, my one chance was a crack in a REALLY hollow flake.

following partner: you put much stock in this placement?
me: it's a mental nut, really.

the quote has lived on.

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Thu Oct 21, 2010 12:22 pm
by NW
No matter how sharp you think your wits are, the rocks below are alot sharper.
No matter how fast you think your reflexes are, gravity's effect is alot faster.

My reasons as to why I don't drink the night before a climb.

Re: Your/the most humorous climbing quotes or sayings

PostPosted: Thu Oct 21, 2010 4:48 pm
by McCannster
"Off belay...sort of"