URGENT!

I'm a researcher for a new TV series to shoot soon in Alaska. There's nice $$$ for this so if you know anyone or you're interested, contact me or use the email address below. Thanks in advance.

A major cable network is seeking experienced outdoorsmen/women who have what it takes to survive an expedition of epic proportions. Grouped in teams of two of three, you will attempt to complete a journey that will take you through some of the toughest terrain that Alaska as to offer. If you are a mountain climber, hunter/fisher, rafter, guide, pilot, or backwoods mastermind with the guts to keep going in even the most grueling of situations, apply now. This is the chance of a lifetime for the right individual.

Candidates must be US citizens over the age of 18 with legitimate survival skills and the wherewithal to keep fighting when the odds are against you. Alaskan residents strongly preferred. To apply, visit www.metalflowersmedia.com or email Janelle@metalflowersmedia.com with your name, age, picture & contact information.

Oooh! Oooh! Pick me!

I'll admit that my "legitimate survival skills" are more in the vein of making it out to civilization or gaining the high ground to flag down a search aircraft - because, you know, that's far more important to real-world survival than setting snares and drinking urine. However, I think I make up for it with other critical personality traits for a budding reality series:

Stereotypability I'm a software engineer who's also part of a volunteer search and rescue team. Although I spend most of that time doing unexciting things like looking for alzheimer's patients, I'm easily stereotyped as the "SAR guy", to be paired up with hunter dude, hippie rafting guide, army ranger survivalist and token city girl. As an added bonus, you can shoot extra footage portraying me as "weekend warrior" and then decide which angle to run with in post-production.

Latent Passive-Aggressive Tendencies That will start manifesting themselves around episode 3, providing interpersonal tension just as the show enters a predictable rut.

Narrow Skill Set Although I can safely guide mr hunter through glaciated terrain or down a multipitch rappel, I will join city girl in squeamishness when our survival depends on eating rabbit eyeballs. This will make for a good balance as at least one of us will always be out of our element.

Prone to Exaggeration Whatever dangers you're trying to hype, I can talk them up. Whether it's the biggest bugs I've ever seen, the rainiest weather I've ever been in or the meanest grizzlies I've ever met, I'm sure I can keep your armchair audience in awe of how epic Alaska is.

PS I hear Bear Grylls was recently fired by Discovery and may be interested in new work with Nat Geo.

Will there be much ice climbing involved? I like ice climbing.